How not to be floored by flooring.

The first few months of choosing flooring can be overwhelming. There is so much choice and at such varying prices. You see something you like and then flip through a magazine and see something you think you may well love more! How to choose what to spend all that money on!

Here is some advice from my experience from the places I have visited locally (Geneva area).

Challandes in Nyon: Good selection of tiles, dalles (exterior) and stone floors. Expensive. Staff couldn't sell humid skin to a mosquito. They open and close about the same time you get to and leave your office - so not great for the working person. Great for inspiration but I would take that inspiration and pay for the goods elsewhere.

Getaz Romang: Lovely new showroom in Etoy. They have real wood flooring and fake as well as tiles and dalles and stone for outside. Helpful staff. They have top of the range products as well as low end products on display.

Sabag: Only do tiles and stone (no wood). A good selection and some very interesting stuff if you are planning on opening a nightclub. Prices are reasonable.

Hornbach: I was scared of what I would find here - it is a bit of a DIY place - however I was nicely surprised by some of what I saw. I don't think it would be wise to buy laminate flooring there (even if it sells for 12m2) as the quality wouldn't be great (unless you wanted it laid somewhere no one could touch it - like on your ceiling). However I found white stone pebble flooring (as you would have in a shower) for 1/3 cheaper then at Getaz  - so definately worth checking out. They also have extemely cheap tiles however sometimes you have to buy when you see it as the stock can go quickly.

Leroy Merlin: The french equivalent of Hornbach. If you import into Switzerland you get the TVA back - added bonus!

Mondial Moquette (Paquis): Looks a little dodgy from the road - however it has a huge selection of carpets and the largest choice of wood (real and laminte) in Suisse Romandie. They guy that runs it - Gils, has a huge knowledge and passion for wood and get's what you want - even when you might not!

Furnishing a large expanse of floors can be expensive - so choices sometimes have ot be made. Bathrooms can be a real pleasure to do as they are small and so you can sometimes let your hair down and go a little wild with your choices without worrying too much about falling out of love with it in a couple of years time when green felt tiles are no longer 'du jour'.

For larger expanses always find a few floor types that you like in different price ranges and then weigh up the pro's and con's.

Finally - A Nasty Surprise Alert.
 The prices are USUALLY by m2 - but not always. So you could be looking at 2 similar tiles one for 50.- a m2 and another for 13.50.- and you may well think the decision is (as I did) a no brainer! Make sure you look closer as it may say 'par pièce' which may mean for example that the 13.50.- tile which may be 25cm x 25cm, would actually cost 216.-  per m2! This would be a nasty surprise for a large room and no one likes a nasty surprise.

Oh and another Nasty Surprise Alert (for good measure):
The cost of the flooring is just for the flooring - you can happily add about 1/2 the price per m2 again to the actual laying of the flooring by a specialist. :)

A piece of advice (after a couple of unfortunate personal experiences) where I thought that the eye could 'carry colour'. It can't. You can think you know a colour and that you have commited it to memory - but it never works out that way. Always get a sample or in Français 'un échantillon' (so much prettier). They will usually give you one for free. Take it with you whenever you need to colour or texture match. It saves time, money and unnecessary tears.

All this said and done - here is nothing as satisfying as walking into a freshly floored room. It can completely change the way a space feels. Floors can make a room darker or lighter, bigger or smaller - fresh or cosy. Even the direction you lay the tiles can make the room feel less or more spacious.

Most importantly - have fun - go with your gut and enjoy!

Sometimes...

Sometimes even gold shoes don't work!

As well as building the house we are doing some renovation work on our town flat in order to rent it out.

I have been waiting for 3 hours for my Kosovan workmen to arrive this morning. I really trusted these guys which makes it worse. I flit from feelings of great irritation - to worry - did the mafia come and take them out for badly laying tiles in the big bosses house!?

They often seem to need payment of large wads of cash without forewarning - to buy 'a big machine'... let's hope it's the sort of machine that evens out mosaic bathroom wall tiles and not one that makes 'rat-tat-tat' sounds...

I found them independantly to do the plasterboard ceilings in our house (the architect had planned wooden ceilings!)  The architect assured me that EVERYONE had wooden ceilings (though I have yet to see it anywhere other than in a chalet). We decided however to go and check it out in a demo house as all modifications to the original house plans cost us an extra 10%*!

The feeling when we walked into the room was one of great oppression. Like the sky was falling down. I'm not sure what feng-shui would say about the perceived weight of wood above but I can tell you it felt all wrong! The only time you want wood closing you in from above is at the very end of your life making your way down an aisle!... and even then I'd rather be turned into a diamond and be set in a tiara...

(*more on architects fee's later when I have more time to rant.)

Making luck

Your perception on your build, it's progress (or lack of) can be greatly influenced by your mood.

This is why getting into the right mindset is crucial when on the way to one's building site.

Every day I have a 30 minute drive to the fledgling house and I use this key time to manually adjust my mood using my car's stereo system. I fully harness the power to overide my current mental outlook with the simple push of any of 1 of 6 lightly dust capped buttons.

For example: Bounding through the front door with the sound of Tina Turner's 'You're Simply The Best' still vibrating in your bones can leave you feeling empowered and ready to tackle all number of trivial distasters. It can mean taking lightning speed decisions on which way the tiles should be laid, what colour joins should be used and if you'd like to spend 1250.- on something you've never even heard of, with great panache and confident vigor.  Enter however, on (pretty much any) James Blunt song and you may find yourself reaching for the nearest broken tile to put an end your misery before you've even crossed the threshold!

Along the same lines... did you know that you can attribute 94.5%* of the successful completion of a project down to having a good luck charm on you at all times? Mine currently happen to be gold ballerinas (shoes - not some Black Swan, James Bond love-child). Not the wisest choice for a building site you say? Well they make me feel bright and happy and they really come into their own when I start frantically tap dancing in order to buy some time before answering an expensive or critical question posed by the Chef de Chantier.
* Unfounded

o la la

I had the chantier meeting today. It was meant to kick off at 9 this morning with the iron monger but he called at about midnight last night to say he couldn't make it. Too many Digestifs after dinner perhaps?

After this initial let down, my mood was greatly improved by the sight of all my beautiful tiles arriving on workmens shoulders through every open window and door - like sunlight bleeding into a dark and dank void. Ok maybe a little too poetic... but I can't tell you how happy I was. I was so excited I almost fainted.

The house meeting went on for 4 hours - starting with the sanitation guy - talking about pipes and other such exotic things... then the painter - who usually complains and acts like he's had a lobotomy when ever I ask something of him - today he was flumoxed. I had printed out Sample Scheme sheets for each room with the colour printed and written so clearly he scratched his head and had to admit he understood everything that I wanted. Just seeing his crestfallen face when he saw how clear it all was, was worth the 7 hours I had put into creating the boards! It can really pay to be anal.

After having finished with The Painter (perhaps we should drop the 'ter') - the iron monger showed up. We spent a good few hours talking about iron. Windows which are lower then 1m need a safety barrier. I had in mind a nice wrought iron bar placed horizontally 20cm's up from the window sill. He whipped out a devis where each window barrier would cost 1430.-. We have 4 windows that need barriers. My turn to do some magic - I whipped out a window barrier I had found at Leroy Merlin for 15.50 euros. There was a long moment of silence as we silently mulled over the 1415.- price difference. Watch this space...

After this moment of great satisafaction I grabbed some food nearby and returned to our empty shell. There were no workers and for once I didn't mind. I opened all the boxes of tiles smiling and stroking each choice in turn like an old friend... fancy seeing you here! - it's been so long - last time I saw you, you were in a show room in Aubonne! Imagine that, now here you are gracing the floors of our dust-pit!

And then I opened my bathroom tiles. I had to sit down.

How to describe them!? They looked like Roquefort cheese - if Roquefort cheese were grey and the fungal spores red... Nothing like the glossy picture adorning the walls at Getaz! Had I really voluntarily paid quite a lot of money for something which looked like it had spent a good few years in a dark, damp cave many miles from any cleaning products!?

I can only hope that my meeting with the Tile Man tomorrow morning will bring wonderful news on how these tiles will simply transform with the application of some special finishing agent (this is where he'll pull one of those typical work-men face sand inhale deeply, shake his head in regret and say... 'but that is quite a lot of work you know and I'll have to draw you up a devis...' which may just negate the saved costs of the window barriers...!

While I wait for exciting new things to happen on my house...

...allow me take you back to day 1.

This was what we bought. A little green goblin house on a piece of land. It was sold to us by a colourful Dutch lady whose house stands in huge grounds boasting wonderful views on the lake. Our land is behind her house, so we have a great view of... her house (more on creeping up on elderly Dutch neighbour with an inflated paper bag later).

ooo ahhh!

It's all going to take off next week...

... (hold that thought - I have been saying that for the last 4 weeks after every thursday chantier meeting). I have to say August is not the time to have 'almost' finished your house. All the tradesmen hang up their tools (or leave them strewn about the place) and disappear for a good 4 weeks! And they don't all go at the same time - they stagger it - so from about June until end of August you can find yourself pulling your hair out as you stand alone in your concrete pit being greeted by nothing but your own forlorn echoes 'hello oo oo oo oo!?'

I tried to comfort myself with the thought that perhaps they would come back refreshed after 3 weeks on a beach but I was radpidly put straight that they usually fly back to Kosovo or Portugal and spend 3 weeks solidly building their own homes! Fat chance they're going to come back fresh as spring chickens!